Do you have trust issues? If you’ve ever said this, you are not alone. So many women that I work with tell me that they have “trust issues.”
What is trust? The word “trust” means a firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something.
Did you know that the Bible never commands us to trust one another? We were commanded to love one another, but no where are we called to trust one another.
Trusting someone and then being disappointed by their inability to be trusted is one of the things that keeps women stuck. It leads to cynicism and skepticism, which in turn…keeps women from forming deeper connections. A lack of deeper connections is the root cause of feeling alone and unsupported.
Instead of trusting others, I want to propose the idea of trusting yourself. Trust your gut when you notice the “red flags”. Trust your intuition when something feels “off”. Trust yourself when you notice how someone’s actions and words don’t line up.
Why don’t women trust themselves?
Most women that I work with don’t trust themselves because they have made bad choices in their past that led to pain. BUT…when you know better, you do better! The choices you made in your past were a result of what you knew. Your choices do not define you. Your choices are your choices. You can trust yourself.
Listen to your heart. Watch the actions of other people. You can judge their actions without judging their heart.
Many times, women are afraid to judge because they are afraid of coming across as judgemental. Being judgemental is when you judge someone’s heart but watching their actions and paying attention to the evidence of their lives gives you the ability to make better decisions in your relationships.
Did you know that everyone is listening to the same radio station? (Even you…)
Everyone is listening to WII FM (What’s In It For ME?) It’s human nature to look for “what’s in it for me”. If you know THIS going into a situation then it isn’t a shock when you notice someone looking out for their own best interest. It’s when you assume that someone will be looking out for your best interest and then they don’t, you are surprised and feel let down. You no longer trust them.
I once heard a quote, “When someone tells you who they are, believe them.”
I like to say that I trust people to be people, I don’t take it personally.
The 2nd greatest commandment says to love your neighbor as yourself. So, you can only love your neighbor as yourself. That means that if someone cannot keep their word to themselves, then it will be impossible for them to keep their word to you.
It’s not personal, it’s principle.
One last thing…if trust is what you see as missing, then be trustworthy. Show up with what you see as missing. Be the change you want to see. Trusting yourself brings the responsibility back home to you. Taking back the responsibilty and trusting yourself brings you back to your personal power.
Whatever you blame, you hand your power over to BUT YOU ARE A POWERFUL CHOOSER!
Trust yourself. Trust your gut. Trust your intuition and trust your judgement.
You are trustworthy!
All My Love,